What’s Holding You Back?

Let’s get real for a second: every single one of us has something holding us back. For some people, it’s finances, drowning in debt while pretending that “buy now, pay later” is a financial strategy. For others, it’s toxic relationships, that one ex who keeps texting “you up?” at 2 a.m. Or maybe it’s addiction; alcohol, drugs, partying, or anything else we use as a Band-Aid for deeper pain.

For me, it’s been the party scene. Since I was 27, I wrestled with cocaine and alcohol. What started as “just a fun night out” quickly became a cycle I couldn’t shake. Nights blurred into mornings, mornings blurred into regrets, and regrets blurred into promises that I’d “never do that again.” (Spoiler: I usually did.)

And here’s the thing, I despised myself for it. You ever look in the mirror and not recognize who’s staring back? That was me. I thought my past mistakes stamped me with a permanent label: unqualified. Not good enough. Too broken to help anyone else.

But here’s where God flips the script. What I thought disqualified me is actually the very thing He wants to use. Those nights I wasted. Those regrets. That battle with addiction. Those aren’t scars to be hidden, they’re stories that can set someone else free.

See, we often think we have to be perfect before we can lead or help others. But that’s not how God works. He uses the broken pieces, the messy chapters, the things we’d rather rip out of our story. He says, “That? Yeah, I’ll use that.”

It’s like rowing a boat across a lake. You don’t get to the other side by staring at the water you just splashed through. You get there by moving forward, stroke by stroke. And when you finally step onto dry ground, you get to turn around and shout across the water: “Hey! I made it, let me show you how.”

So, what’s holding you back? What parts of yourself are you trying to outrun? What areas of your life do you need to dissect; finances, addiction, relationships, fear, anger, whatever it is? Here’s the truth: you can’t keep dragging it with you and expect to move forward.

Maybe, like me, you need to finally say: That was the old me. It doesn’t define me anymore.

And hey, if God can take my late-night party binges, my battles with cocaine and alcohol, and my years of regret, and use them to encourage someone else, then He can do the same for you.

So, what’s your “thing”? What’s that weight you’ve been carrying? Write it down. Face it. Decide it’s no longer who you are. Then move forward, one stroke at a time, until you can help someone else on the other side of the lake.

Because the truth is this: what you think disqualifies you is probably the very thing God wants to hold up as proof of His power in your life.

And who knows? Someday, someone might just thank you for the exact thing you used to despise.

4 Simple Steps to Break Free and Move Forward

1. Reflect: Take an honest look at what’s holding you back. Write it down. Don’t sugarcoat it. Be brutally real.

2. Release: Forgive yourself for the past. That version of you doesn’t get to run the show anymore.

3. Replace: Swap out destructive habits with life-giving ones; prayer, exercise, journaling, serving others. (Yes, it feels weird at first, but weird can become wonderful.)

4. Rebuild: Start small. One good decision at a time. Stack enough of those and you’ll look back and realize you’re not the same person anymore.